I have been taking some time off work and tried video-gaming again.
For me, video-gaming is a double-edged sword. Either it puts me in a relaxed state through escapism or in a competitive mode where I need to win.
The latter is the reason why I consider myself pretty good in videogames like World of Warcraft, League of Legends, and Overwatch a few years back.
During my first two days of my vacation, I was playing for some hours and felt relaxed. Nothing to worry about. Only some objectives that the game wants you to achieve with teammates.
But today it put me in a competitive mode. The matches made me frustrated with my own performance and even teammates. Small details bothered and put in emotional states that I haven’t felt in a long time.
Even though I win, the losses hurt more and give me random stress.
Thanks to this, I won’t play competitive video-games anymore during this week. I’m not taking time off to get stressed about a video-game. It is not worth it unless I want to achieve something in it.
Which isn’t the case.